Are You The Master Of Your Destiny?

How strong are you?

I'm not asking if you can carry 150 lbs. of weight. What I'm
after is your strength of character. How resilient are you to
hang on to your dreams amidst the raging forces of discouragement
and criticisms?

There are far too many individuals who never get to experience
the joy of attaining their desires because other people's
influence has significantly (and sometimes negatively) affected
their crucial decisions.

Are there instances in your life when other people said that
you should not continue your plans because they're never gonna
work? What did you do? Did you continue your endeavors or did
you just follow their command?

If you always adhere to other's beliefs and opinions even though
they are contrary to yours, you're just torturing yourself. It's
like you don't have a mind of your own. You're like a shadow
following the moves of someone else.

You may listen to other people's advices, but never let them
control you. If their advices would contribute to your
success and well being, then by all means follow them. But
if they would hinder you and stray you away from what you
really want in life, then you've got to make a stand and
pursue your heart's aspirations.

Sure there would be criticisms. But if you always avoid
them, then you will never be truly happy.

As one famous person said, "There is a sure way to avoid
criticisms, be nothing and do nothing. This remedy never
fails." True enough.

Take my case.

When I was in first year college, my dad wanted me to shift
my course to Physical Therapy because it was in demand in the
United States at that time. But I wanted to continue my
studies in Accountancy. I remained firm with my decision
and after some negotiations they finally gave in.

Then there's my love life. Chinese tradition states that
Chinese people marry their own kind. (No offense) But I fell
madly in love with this Filipino girl. Despite all the
criticisms, discouragement, and harsh words (pardon me), I
defended my love for her. Right now we're going strong and
my relatives have respected my decision.

You see, if I have given up easily in any of the two scenarios,
I would've deprived myself of joy and contentment in my life.

Sometimes other people's words would cut like a knife. But
never be disheartened. Listen to the voice inside of you.
We will never be able to satisfy everybody because each of
us is unique. We have our own distinct traits and values.
Respect for each other's opinions should be upheld.

With that said, I would like to leave this final message that
sums it all up. Follow your heart and happiness will follow.

Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion Wizard," an ebook designed to fully improve your relationships, multiply your profits, win negotiations, and help you attain all the desired freedom and power you could ever dream of. Go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now and grab a sample chapter.

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Dare To Dream

The rewards of life come to those who do, not to those who
merely read, talk or day dream. Action is the key.
Okay I want you to answer this question:
"In December of last year did you achieve all you set out
to achieve in January of the same year?"
This is a 'yes or no' answer, so don't spend too long
considering it.
The answer, of course, is 'no' - unless you are a
pathological liar!
Next question: "Did you set out to achieve anything last
year?"
Aha! Now that's a more interesting question I think.
Deciding at the start of a year that you want to achieve a
certain result by the end of that year, is an example of
our old friend goal-setting.
High-performance people set goals. Winners set goals.
Losers never set goals. Why? Because it takes about 20
minutes of concentrated effort to write down your goals,
and losers have far more important things to do than this.
It interferes with valuable boozing time, for example. Such
a task would take up nearly a whole episode of a soap
opera. You could read a trash newspaper from cover to cover
in this time.
But there is a more important reason why many people don't
write goals. It is this. Writing goals commits you to
action, otherwise there is little point in writing them.
Turning your dreams (goals) into reality will not happen
automatically. It will require work and effort.
"Ohmygod!!! WORK, and EFFORT??? Forget it man! I'm not
writing down anything on a piece of paper which will commit
me to that!"
This is why people do not set goals (write down their
dreams). They cannot bear to have that piece of paper
leering at them in silent accusation as the months tick by.
But what is at stake here? Nothing less than undreamed of
wealth, unlimited happiness, and a totally fulfilled life.
Perhaps more importantly, you can meet your fear head on
and live like a warrior, not a frightened rabbit.
The older I get the more I wonder what the hell we're all
so afraid of. Like you, I travel the world and see or hear
about real problems; murder, torture, death, disease and
starvation. Then I return to this grey, stuffy country to
witness intelligent and privileged people wasting their
lives away down the pub or propped in front of the TV
screen for (on average) four hours each night! Unbelievable!
And these people are also timid beyond belief. They are
completely risk-averse and will run bleating to the
authorities if the tiniest upset ruffles the calm waters of
their uneventful lives. I am saying all this in the hope
that it will make you shudder. None of it applies to you,
of course.
Achieving great wealth and happiness starts with having a
dream. Today's dreams are surely tomorrow's realities. So
you blew it last year? You have a chance to redeem yourself
this year - if you have the guts of course.
Got any fight left in you, or have you thrown in the towel
long ago? Are you a shivering, frightened little mouse or a
human being prepared to fight and win? Are you going to
spend the rest of this year bleating and moaning about how
you cannot succeed? Or are you going to do something about
making your own success a reality?
Are you prepared to fight?

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Believe In Yourself And Become a Winner: Lessons from Hollywood

A while ago I made it a point to watch the movie "Legally Blonde."

Not just for the bright, chirpy and eminently watchable Reese Witherspoon, but also because I loved the message it sent out.

If you didn't see the movie, all you need to know is that it's about a smart, fashion-conscious blonde who's told time and again, by her family and friends, that it'simpossible for someone like her to go to Harvard law school.

That she's just not smart enough and doesn't have what it takes.

In the movie, the character played by Witherspoon not only goes to Harvard law, but also through sheer determination and intuition, graduates at the top of her class.

Its just the sort of movie people love. Because it makes us believe that we too are capable of achieving anything we want to.

It reminds us how we often let ourselves, and others, underestimate our own potential.

And how we undermine our own sense of self, because of what we look like or where we came from.

But why just let it remain a movie, when it can be the story of your life...

Have you ever asked yourself what it is that keeps you from reaching your full potential?

From doing what you are inherently capable of?

For many of us, it's a lack of belief in ourselves. A lack of confidence in our own ability to succeed.

And because we believe we will fail, we usually do.

But there are people who have succeeded beyond all expectation - no matter what they look like, or where they come from.

One of my favourite role models who comes to mind is another Hollywood celebrity, Barbra Streisand.

Indeed, one of my favourite films of all time is her movie, "Yentl," about a courageous, intelligent woman trying to fulfill her capabilities, in the face of overwhelming odds.

"Yentl" was also the movie in which Streisand became the first woman ever to produce, direct, write and star in a major motion picture.

Streisand carved her own path, and broke the mould.

She showed how a woman with unconventional looks can make it in a field where beauty is more important than brains.

So, if you believe that you are less than someone, because of your lack of education, looks, talent, background or ability, take courage from her achievements.

They are an inspiration not only for women, but for everyone.

Because all it take is a belief. The belief that you can do what it takes.

Don't wait for someone else to give you an opportunity to prove yourself. Stop depending on others for handouts.

Don't wait for the right opportunity to fall in your lap. Because it never will.

All you need to carve your own path, is the confidence and the belief that you can succeed at anything you set out to do, no matter what the odds.

So start today. Choose a mentor.

Learn from the masters. Re-invent yourself.

Create your own opportunities and forge your own future.

Your belief in yourself, coupled with the courage to see it through, is what will carry you from a life of mediocrity and under-achievement, into a world where you can be the winner you aspire to be.

Priya Shah is the editor of the newsletters Be a Whiz at eBiz! and The Glutathione Report She shows you how to truly build multiple sources of income online with the Brilliant Team Home Business Opportunity

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Dont Die With Your Dreams Still Inside You

INSPIRATION can be a powerful thing. It can
keep you going when all around you cries out
"quit!" It is even more powerful than motivation,
as motivation gives you your basic reasons to keep
going--it tells you why you want to do what you do,
because motivation is based on goals. These, in
turn, may be based on necessity want or desire. But
inspiration fills those reasons with hope, possibil-
ity and enjoyment and keeps the "grind" from becoming
too grindy.

But just what does inspiration consist of? I
posit two elements: vision and mission. Proverbs
29:18 says 'Where there is no vision, the people
perish." A vision is the first step toward turning
your motivation into inspiration. A person with a
vision sees down the road. He can sense what it
will be like six weeks, six months, a year, two
years, five years and more ahead.

But how do you get a vision?, you ask. First
of all, you need to narrow your perspective. You can't
attempt to "ride off in all directions at once,"
so to speak. Try to decide what it is you are
looking for, so you'll know it when you see it.
In other words, try to have in mind some general
goals as to where you want to be six months a year,
etc. from now. These goals will not only form the
basis of your motivation but should also serve to
limit to an extent the scope of your activity.

Next, try to locate and choose an opportunity
(buisness, career or job) which you feel is right for you.
This may be easier said then done, as there are many choices
which sound good. You may come upon an outstanding one
right away, purely by chance. If so, latch onto it. But
you will probably have to pick several at first and
study the things which each one offers and try to
evaluate the potential of each one as you see it.
Settle on the one which you feel has the most
potential with the least amount of hassle (preferably
one that is totally Internet driven as opposed to
one where you have to spend time calling potential
prospects by phone).

Once you have chosen your company, stand behind
it in every way and don't quit or change your mind.
B.C. Forbes said "Without loyalty, nothing can be
accomplished in any sphere..." Think of yourself as
being in it for the long haul, no matter what. And
try to envision, based on what you know, how things
will be down the road. Keep that picture before your
mind, and never doubt. Napoleon Hill said "What the
mind can conceive and believe it can achieve,"
and the Bible says, in Hebrews 11:1 "Faith is
the substance of things hoped for, the evidence
of things not seen."

Once the vision is firmly implanted in your mind,
let it become your driving force. Let the vision excite
you with the possibility of its fulfillment and you will
automatically begin the next step--you are on a mission.
Your mission is to bring about the realization of the
vision. If you keep the vision in mind, you will move
forward in the mission, accomplishing enthusiastically
step by step that which is necessary to bring the vision
into reality. You will have developed a sense of excite-
ment, importance and urgency which will keep the fires of
inspiration burning in your heart and moving you ever onward
and upward.

Article written by Rev. James M. Becher, Bible teacher, author of "OF SUCH IS THE KINGDOM, A Novel of Biblical Times," (http://www.publishedauthors.net/jamesmbecher/index.html), and publisher of the bi-weekly Ezine, "Inspirational Success Tips" (inspirationalsuccesstips@Freeautobot.com)

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Taking The Leap

Every four years, February gives us a whole 24 hours of bonus footage to add to our year. Many people take this opportunity to "do something special" with their extra day. But why wait for Leap Day? Why not celebrate the "leaps" and risks we take every day when we venture outside of our comfort zone or work to improve our lives?

Of course change, especially life-altering change, is bone-shakingly frightening sometimes. The whole concept is fraught with a veritable minefield of "what ifs" that can be hard for us to see and get past in order to reach the destination point where our dreams lie. So I offer you the following "what ifs" along with some answers to help you take that leap, whatever it may be, and land safely on the other side!

1) What if I suck?

So suck. I'm a big fan of sucking. Being awful at the outset (often referred to in Eastern cultures as the possessing a beginner's mind) keeps you from getting cocky and is the ideal state from which to achieve perfection; those who think they don't suck often believe, incorrectly, that they have no more to learn. One of the things that I learned a long time ago is that it is often better to be a blank slate upon which those who are there to teach you can write than to come equipped with prejudices, techniques and ways of doing things that are inappropriate or even destructive to the new situation and that have to be unlearned before any real progress can be made. Learn to love your inner doofus. It's one of the things that keep you from stagnating at your current level of achievement.

2) What if get there and I hate it?

So hate it. It's hardly the end of the world. In fact, many cultures and religions believe that we're put here in this life to experience and enjoy all of the vast range of human experience, including being miserable and other negative emotions. And some people, such as writers, artists, musicians and the like, actually look forward to such times as a way to accumulate top-shelf material for their next project. So feel free to feel bad - revel in it, if you will - and then when you get bored, move on to the next amusement ride of life and give someone else a turn at whatever you were doing.

3) What if I love it so much that I'm torn about stopping to have a family, going to school, running off to join the circus (or whatever your previous long-term plans were)?

As the saying goes, "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans for tomorrow". Plans have a way of becoming either "traps or scraps" as life has its own way with you. They can be traps by virtue of making you feel obligated to follow them, especially if you have "sunk costs" like a degree, family expectations or a long career invested in them, even when you no longer get any enjoyment out of that way of life. And they often end up scrapped when unforeseen circumstances blow us so far out to sea, as it were, that we no longer have any hope of paddling back to that particular shore in our lifetime. When that sort of event occurs in the absence of any real alternatives, the loss can be as devastating as a death. Learn to arrange your life so that you will enjoy it even if your long-range plans never come true. Then, when and if it's the right time to head out after your original goals, you'll have a great foundation to build on.

You should also learn to distinguish between "planning for" and "planning to do". If you have a goal you'd like to accomplish or reach one day, plan for it (stay healthy and take your vitamins if you want a family, save for tuition if you'd like to go to school, sharpen your tumbling skills if the circus is your raison d'etre, etc.), but don't worry so much about planning to do it, such as engaging in the process of creating a step-by-step 5-year plan - and then dealing with the attendant stress of not meeting your arbitrarily established milestones should life intervene, as it is wont to do. You'll know when you get there that it's time to start actively working toward your goal, assuming life doesn't take you in an entirely new direction before then, and by that time your life will may changed so much that quite probably none of your previously generated plans will be relevant anyway. Trying to fit your life into an established plan despite its protests to the contrary causes untold sorrow and pain. Live the life that makes you happy today, tomorrow and everyday, and let your long-term plans stretch and bend to accommodate your life rather than the other way around.

4) What if I get depressed, sick, lost, confused, etc. and can't keep up with the requirements of this new venture?

So don't keep up - fly, fall, wallow, soar, bounce, flop. It's just more material and more experience! Again - when you get bored, move on, move up, get medical or other help if necessary, and let someone else get on the ride.

5) What if I'm too lazy, too set in my ways, too undisciplined, eccentric, etc., to be a "player"?

Work with yourself, not against yourself. It's called working smarter, not harder. They make big ol' honking posters about it and stick them up on in break rooms everywhere. Learn to work with your strengths and around your weaknesses to get the most done with the least amount of effort and you'll be a step ahead of the rest of the floundering, struggling, gasping pack expending all their generative energy swimming upstream trying to do it the "right" way!

6) What I decide I want to do this, and then can't get a high-enough salary, make money at it, get famous, make it a success (or whatever your preferred form of compensation may be)?

Well, you could kick the guys in accounting in the shins and swipe their wallets while they're down, but that's really a short-term solution.

Remember, money doesn't always come in the form of money. Company cars, laptops, benefits, etc., can all be part of a corporate package and they don't hurt the guys in accounting as bad as being forced to add zeros to a check (or as bad as being kicked in the shins, for that matter). As for non-work-related changes, remember that living a happy life that you control can net you big-time compensation in the form of better health (and we all know how medical bills can add up), less stress, an effervescent sense of freedom that is hard to replicate without illegal drugs and other intangible benefits. It usually "pays" more to live a great life with less money than to live a miserable one with a better paycheck.

7) But really, what if there's a real cash-flow problem?

Pretend to be a religious holy person on a 'real world' sabbatical. Scale back your life, use the money you do make for the bare essentials and spend your free time doing good works. Stuff will come your way through networking, contacts, your good reputation, etc. Opening the doors of your life to other people allows for two-way travel, you know.

8) What if there's not enough money, freedom, compensation, etc., to accommodate plans I've already made?

You remember what I said about plans, right? Sometimes, you'll just have to choose between plans made then and dreams sought now. Another saying that speaks to this issue is as follows: "You can have anything you want in this life. You just can't have everything." Go over both your plans and your dreams. Which one gives you the greater feeling of joy? Which one, when you think about abandoning it, gives you the greater feeling of loss? It's occasionally a close call, but usually a simple process of prioritization and revisiting old, and sometime changed, values and needs shows a clear winner.

9) What if I buckle under the pressure?

Take some yoga classes - it makes buckling easier and more graceful, and you don't make those embarrassing popping noises in your knees. Plus, the meditation and stretching/breathing will make you less likely to buckle, as well. And learn to take wisdom from those grade-school fire-safety posters - sometimes you have to get really low in order to escape the heat and save yourself. Don't assume that a lowered posture is a sign of a lowered stature. Sometimes it can serve to take the heat off your back until the fire calms down.

10) What if I FAIL (gasp!) and have to return to (whatever life you left), and everyone will know and it will suck?

And so, we have come full circle - back to sucking. Suck, baby, suck! It's when life sucks that it quits being boring. And if you do have to go back, don't go back with your tail between your legs (get that thing removed, will you? It's disturbing when you wag it). Go back with an enhanced resume/life experience including all the new and nifty stuff you've learned. Present yourself as returned from a cross-training internship working along side the big guys, and now ready to take on greater (and greater recompensed) challenges! The "real" players do it all the time - why not you?

I have created a free month-long e-course developed from this article, available on my website, including all of the material above, expanded and partnered with action steps that you can take to ensure that you stick the landing of your leap with a 10.0 score for finesse, style and energy! I am also working on an even larger and more in-depth coaching program building up from this e-course - look for it to be available sometime later this year!

(c) Soni Pitts

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Soni Pitts is the Chief Visionary Butt-Kicker of SoniPitts.Com. She specializes in helping others reclaim "soul proprietorship" in their lives and to begin living the life their Creator always intended for them.

She is the author of the free e-book "50 Ways To Reach Your Goals" and over 100 self-help and inspirational articles, as well as other products and resources designed to facilitate this process of personal growth and spiritual development.

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If It Feels Good, It Must Be Right

Is it possible to motivate yourself to do something you don't enjoy doing?

Let me illustrate with my own example.

I'm not a natural networker. I'm no good at schmoozing and talking people into doing things I want them to do.

I've been told that I'm too upfront and honest for my own good. I know its true.

So how did I land up in network marketing?

Well, I always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom AND continue working.

Now network marketing OFFLINE is not exactly my cup of tea.

My "warm market" would probably be cold to my advances.

Attend meetings? But I thought the idea was to AVOID the awful commute!

If I called a friend over, it would be to chat about college days - NOT try to "introduce" them to "my new business."

I'm simply not comfortable with many of the methods that are used to "recruit" people.

But I'm still managing to do a decent job of building my organisation.

I also manage to keep myself motivated enough to WANT to spend every waking moment on my business.

How do I do it? I found something about the business I loved - the internet!

Now the internet is a whole new ball game as far as networking is involved.

On the internet you don't get rich by approaching people who aren't interested in what you have to offer. Uninvited advances are better known by the word "spam."

You don't lurk in chat rooms - the real-world equivalent of street corners - and accost them (no matter what your upline tells you).

You find out where they hang out and then make your presence felt in those places - like search engines, ezines, discussion lists.

If you can write reports, offer useful information, establish yourself as someone willing to share their expertise - your prospects will FIND YOU.

And if you can find something about the business you love - something about it that gives you a RUSH - you will never be short on motivation.

Its my love for researching and writing reports that gives me the motivation and the edge I need.

With you it could be any number of things - helping people, interacting with others, making friends, writing articles, designing a website - all the things the internet is good for.

And you'll soon find out that if it feels good for you, it'll most likely be good for your business.

Priya Shah is the editor of the newsletters Be a Whiz at eBiz! and The Glutathione Report She shows you how to truly build multiple sources of income online with the Brilliant Team Home Business Opportunity

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Ten Tips to Create More Life for Your Life

When people begin to investigate career change, often they don't want a new career at all. They love their career -- but they also want time for creating a life outside work. As a lifetime leisure-seeker, I've created ten tips to help you get started on the quest for "more time in your life -- and more fun."

1. Decide where leisure ranks on your list of values. Are you working to pay for something that you don't value very much?

2. Seize moments during the day, evening, lunchtime and weekend. Time management guru Alan Lakein calls this the "Swiss cheese method:" using the holes. Think "fun" in fifteen-minute segments.

3. Buy leisure time. Hiring a teenager to mow your lawn may give you an hour or more, depending on the size of your property. Get even more creative. For a price, your pet-sitter might be persuaded to take Fluffy to the vet and Fido to the groomer.

4. Stop doing things that nobody will miss.

I once worked with someone who stopped answering requests for reports from "senior management." When a vice president asked, "Where is your report?" he would prepare one on the spot. Most of the time, nobody noticed!

Same goes for housekeeping: do you need the "cleanest house in town" award?

5. Set limits and set them again. Saying "no" to invitations is a beginning. You can also define your scope: "I will be happy to help as long as I can do the work on Saturday."

I've role-played scenarios with clients who think the earth will cave in if they say "no." Often they're amazed to find nobody missed them.

6. Stop losing energy to procrastination or fear. If you dread making that call or put off changing that light bulb, do it now and enjoy leisure, guilt-free.

7. Ignore the pressure of, "Everybody else is participating." Chances are everybody else is miserable -- or isn't doing any more than you are.

8. Prioritize your time for energy boosters and time expanders? Meditation, journal writing and exercise will increase your energy and miraculously add hours to your day.

9. Grab a large block of time each week to do exactly what you want. Two hours? A whole afternoon? An afternoon in an art museum (or an evening at a basketball game) will often unravel the knots that keep you working late.

10. Call for outside help if you're still trapped by the "should" monitor. Find a friend, counselor or coach -- someone who can offer you an objective insight and clarify priorities.

Bonus tip: Remind yourself every day: Very few people on their deathbed say, "I wish I'd spent more time at the office," or, "I should have done more dusting." Will you be one of the few?

Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., wrote Making the Big Move (New Harbinger 1999). She works with professionals who have seen the light and are ready to ditch their current career and start a second one.
Website: http://www.cathygoodwin.com
Your Next Move Ezine:
http://www.cathygoodwin.com/subscribe.html or cathy@cathygoodwin.com with "YNM" in subject line.
Contact: cathy@cathygoodwin.com 505-534-4294

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Getting What You Really Want

Everyone wants something in life, love, money, success, recognition ... Yet too many people fail to realize their desires, and nearly all of them for the same reason. They seem to go whichever way the wheel turns, as if they have no control over their situation. If their vehicle takes them to places they never intended to be, or crashes into the brickwall of utter despair, that's just the cruelty of fate.

Don't get me wrong, I realize that truly horrible things do happen to folks, and through no fault of their own. Gigantic obstacles are placed in our way sometimes, that seem absolutely insurmountable. Generally speaking, however, getting what you really want out of life is a matter of three (possibly four) simple steps.

Firstly - and this may seem like a no-brainer - you have to decide what it is you want the most. Decide what to aim for, with some specificity. Don't make a laundry list of wishes, but focus on one thing at a time. If you're not sure about where you want to go, there's no point in getting into the vehicle in the first place.

Secondly, create an action plan. This will be your map for getting from point A, where you are now, to point B, where you want to go. You know what you want, what steps are you going to take to get it?

Some things are obvious. If you want a better job, start with skills assessment and maybe some additional training. Then you'll need to sell yourself and your skills either to your present employer for a promotion into the new position you want, or to a new employer.

Other goals will require a bit more thought. Some will really leave you stuck without a clue of how to get there. Not to worry, though, no matter where it is you want to go, someone, somewhere has probably already been there. So what did they do to get there, what road did they take? Books, biographies and such, can be a real help with this. So hit the library if you're in need of guidelines.

Get ideas, get advice, create a good map for yourself, and know where you're going. Write it down, and make sure you can read it every day.

The third and final step is execution. Do what you planned. Take the steps you outlined on your road map and be persistent. If you run into naysayers, simply ignore them. Everyone who ever did anything great always ran into naysayers.

Never take your eyes off the goal. Keep pushing. Whatever you do, do not give up until you have what you desire in your hands. Never, ever give into the notion that you 'can't get there from here.'

Decide - Plan - Execute. It is really that simple.

About that fourth step. Sometimes your action plans may not get you to where you want to be. Maybe something is missing, maybe some step is not quite right. If you find this is the case, after exercising your full patience and persistence, you simply must rework your plan.

Look at it, figure out what's missing, and get back at it. It's just like following a map through a place you've never been before. If you find taking a particular road takes you to the wrong town, rather than turning around and going home, giving up, you take a second look at your map, figure out where you made the wrong turn, and get back on the road.

Whatever you do -- Keep your hands on the wheel!

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The Language of Appalachia

Imagine my surprise when I went to Jamaica a few years ago and learned that I do, indeed, have an accent. You see, unlike my paternal grandmother, I don't stretch the word "cornbread" into four syllables. She might say, "Here. Have ye some co-orn-bray-ed;" whereas I might say, "You want some corn-bread?" See? Two syllables on the cornbread; "you" rather than "ye."

Unlike my maternal grandmother, I say "carrion" rather than "kyarn." In fact, I had no idea what she was talking about until recently when I mentioned the word to my husband. I told him, "Grandmother used to say, 'That stinks like kyarn.' I never figured out what 'kyarn' was." He said, "Road kill." My jaw dropped. "You mean, carrion? Kyarn is carrion?" "Yeah," he said. "Put the Appalachian accent to it." It made sense.

Unlike my mother-in-law, I say "they fought," not "they fit."

Thus, I concluded that I have no accent. After all, I'm fairly well educated. I studied French for three years, and I did some self-study of German and Greek. Plus, I'm well read, and I've authored several books. Ain't I the berries? I couldn't possibly have a hillbilly, Appalachian accent. And, yet, in Jamaica, everyone I met asked, "What part of the South are you from?"

So, I did a little research and learned that the Appalachian region has its own language. Linguists call it "Appalachian English." The Scots-Irish settled the entire region known as Appalachia (all of West Virginia and portions of Virginia, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Kentucky, Tennessee and Georgia) in the mid-1700's. At the time, physical boundaries kept modernization out. Then in the 1940's, the Great Smoky Mountains National Park was created; and that brought tourists to the area. By the 1950's, highways and telephones were more prevalent throughout Appalachia, bringing the modern world another step closer to its rural inhabitants.

Now, I don't want you to think we in Appalachia are a bunch of snobs. We realize that the same immigrants who settled here settled land elsewhere, but the linguists tell us that our speech patterns will not be found in any other dialect to the extent that they are in Appalachia. In addition, we Appalachians use variants of our own speech patterns. Just because I don't use the same words as my grandmothers doesn't mean that I don't have an Appalachian accent. In fact, the linguists say that each region has its own speech patterns and that most of us allow our situations to govern our speech. For example, when I'm talking with my family, I'm liable to let down my guard a little-use a bit more Appalachian English and a bit less Standard American English. In a more formal situation, I'll try to employ a lot less Appalachian English. Even though I know from personal experience that most Appalachians are not "dumb hillbillies," I'm afraid that others might see me that way if I use the language I naturally use. And yet, some phonological differences are so inbred, that I can't not use them.

Did you know that the t at the end of slept is not silent? You might say, "I slept in this morning." I would say, "I slep in." To me, that "t" just doesn't feel right. It reminds me of an episode of "All in The Family" where Edith met a Jewish baker and he called her "Edit." She told him, "My name's Edith! Th!" So then he called her "Edit-th." To me, "slep-t" would be every bit as awkward.

Do you say "exactly" or "exackly"? And how about ten? I've actually heard people say "ten" with a short e sound-like in the word "bed." How weird is that? Tin and ten are words with the "exack" same sound but different meanings.

The linguists also point out some lexical differences in Appalachian English. For example, the Standard American English word might be faucet, but the Appalachian English version would be spigot. If somebody looks sick, we might say, "he's peaked" (that's peek-ed). Did you hurt your finger? Then we might say you "stoved it up." I once knew a man who substituted "for" for "because." He'd say, "I need to go to the store, for I'm out of milk." My brother would substitute the entire remainder of our family with the word "nim." He'd ask me, "Did Mama and nim go to the store?" Some people say "knowed" rather than "knew." We're famous for our double negatives. "I don't have none of that." Our present perfect tense has raised some eyebrows, too. "He's done done it now!"

This little foray into my Appalachian heritage has given me new insight. We might chop off some of our "-ings"; we might "reckon" rather than "guess" sometimes; and we might have places with such outlandish names as "Lick Skillet," "Frog Holler" and "Sugar Loaf," but we have a rich history. We know where we came from and, for the most part, where we're going. And if anyone thinks we're a bunch of ignorant hillbillies, then you ought to come and get to know us a little better. If you stay long enough, we might be able to teach you how to talk right.

Gayle Trent's latest book is a comedic mystery titled BETWEEN A CLUTCH AND A HARD PLACE. Find out more about the book at Gayle's Web Page.

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Military Wives

I feel now is the perfect time to address the conflict service-members face when balancing between what they feel are infringements upon their civil liberties cast down by their president.



I have never been one to get involved with inter-service rivalries because I have always felt we must remain, "We band of brothers" and support and defend our own constitutions against all enemies, either foreign wives or domestic. (I am of course referring to wives in the singular sense.)



So let us, as Abraham Lincoln said, "Cast aside our differences" and as the modern day philosopher Marshall Mathers raps, "Let's get down to business. I've got no time to play around what is this."



You may be the senior man at work, but your wife is the Commander in Chief of the House or (CINCHOUSE). You say this because you believe in the immortal words of our 16th CINC, Abraham Lincoln when he said, "A house divided against itself is sure to fall."



You also know that it's not always advisable to follow the advice of our 1st CINC because, "Honesty is (NOT) always the best policy." If you chop down a cherry tree, in order to preserve good order and discipline, you don't tell the truth. You blame it on the kids because if you don't, she might draft a Declaration of Independence, throw you in the harbor, and declare a revolution.



You realize you have "No convening legal authority." If something goes wrong at home or a bill needs to be paid, Harry Truman summed it up best when he said, "The buck stops here." The buck always stops with you.



You need to "Walk softly and carry a big stick," of money because if you don't she's not afraid to drop the bomb on you. Two, if she has to and you're liable to be put, not in the White House, but impeached to the dog house. All the while proclaiming like Nixon that, "I am not a crook," and "You won't have me to kick around anymore."



It's at this stage you realize you serve at the discretion of the President and need to "Read her lips" and "Ask not what she can do for you but what you can do for her."



There's no need to, "Tear down that wall." Do your best to fit into her "Great Society" because you won't be getting a "New Deal."



You must sing, "Hail to the Chief" because in the immortal words of the great disco song, "She's a CINC ???..HOUSE!"



What military men need to realize is when you get married you pledge an oath to support and defend the constitution, but she will amend your constitution? There will be no hearings, and there will be not one vote. She has the bully pulpit and the mandate. All you can do is cry to your buddies, "Man, this is an infringement upon my rites."



There comes a time in every military man's career, usually the first day of boot camp or marriage when you realize you must "Obey the orders of the president and all officers (Her mother) appointed over me."



Needless to say, as it pertains to the institution of marriage. I have decided not to be a lifer. Someday a recruiter might be able to sell me on a lifetime self-commitment to the CINCHOUSE, but for now I prefer to be a conscientious objector.

Michael P. Westhead is the founder of www.cutthroatcomedy.com which features original quotes, jokes, cartoons, products, and articles focusing on politics, current events and life in general.

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The Patience of Job

The Patience of Job


Voltaire said, "God is a comedian playing to an audience afraid to laugh." Translated, if you're a tight ass, there's a two drink minimum to read this article.



Let me just say, I believe in God but like many, I've questioned His existence. Most people will say the reason they doubt God's existence is because, "If there's a God, why is there so much suffering, and why is there war?" Blah, Blah, blah, blah blah?



My sole reason for doubting the existence of God is work. (I, however, never question the existence of a higher power for I worship at his altar every day from 9 to 5.)



If there is a God why do we not have five-day weekends and two-day workweeks? He's God. He can make it happen. In God we trust, right? Well I trust in God to give us a five-day weekend.



Think of the positives of a two-day work week. You'd say things like, "Wow, that workweek really flew bye."



Think of what it would do for the economy because as Americans what are we really, but consumers? Think of it this way. If the United States Senate can get away with only working 110 days a year, why can't we?



Women will have five full days a week to shop, and tell men what to do. Maybe, just maybe, we'll have more time to spend with our kids so they don't remain a bunch of illiterate crack heads.



More people might believe in heaven because life on earth won't be such a living hell.



I believe, with faith, God will grant us my wish. Let me illustrate through the Bible. Isn't it ironic that in the book of the Bible where the name of the person who suffers the most is spelled J.O.B.?



The story of Job is one of perseverance. Job is given leprosy, has his family, money and worldly possessions taken from him and it's all a test of faith. It is a horrible story! I didn't like it when I read it but I said. "Fine, He's God. He can do what He wants. After all, it is His world. Like Job, who am I to question?"



What I can question are employers playing the part of God by expecting us to have the patience of Job in order to keep our job. They may not be giving us infectious diseases but they are sure taking our money, ruining our personal lives, and making work a living hell. (Personally, I don't have the patience of Job. I'm like the Prodigal Son--at the first sign of a party I'm off to the fatted cow happy hour for half-price matzoh and dollar shots of Manishevitz. If I need some bread I'll come back in the morning crawling on my hands and knees.)



In the Book of Job, Job finally said, "Hey God, how bout a little something for the effort?" God responded, "Don't question my authority but you're right. I have been a little harsh on you." Job then had all his riches returned ten-fold. Now that's pretty just, is it not?



Well, I'm asking, "Hey God, how bout a five-day weekend, for the heck of it?" (If you see me on the golf course mid-week you'll know God answered my prayers.)





Michael P. Westhead is the founder of www.cutthroatcomedy.com which features original quotes, jokes, cartoons, products, and articles focusing on politics, current events and life in general.

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Cant Get There From Here

Can't Get There From Here



Juneau is the capital of Alaska, but did you know that you cannot drive there from anywhere?



You can fly into Juneau or you can take a ferry to Juneau, but you can't actually drive there. There are no roads into Juneau. Can you imagine not being able to drive to the State Capital in the state where you live?



Normally, a lot of business and a lot of government takes place in a state's Capital. Not having easy access to it would create lots of problems, wouldn't it? Well, not in Alaska.



In fact, up until a few years ago Juneau was two time zones or more away from the rest of the state. A few years ago Alaska had five time zones. Now we have only two time zones and our Capital is now in the same time zone as most of the state.



Governor Frank Murkowski has a transportation plan that would include the building of a 65 mile road from Juneau to Skagway by the year 2010. That would connect Juneau by road to Anchorage, Fairbanks, and much of Alaska.



Of course, you would have to drive through part of Canada to get to Skagway. Not a big deal, since Canada still likes us.



However, many Alaskans are not too thrilled by the idea of building an expensive road to Juneau. According to Skagway business owner, Jan Wrentmore, "It will be as stupid an idea in 2010 as it is now."



Part of the issue is that Skagway and Haines depend on the marine ferry system for business, since Skagway and Haines are the northernmost terminus for tourists who want to disembark the ferry and drive. The fear is that Juneau would become the northernmost stopping point for the ferry if a road is built from Juneau to Skagway.



"We lose our status of what we've had for 100 years," said Jan Wrentmore. "It creates a competing port."



Of course, the rest of Alaska doesn't really care about the competing port issue. The point is that the rest of Alaska doesn't really care about the whole issue. Our legislators at the State Capital seem to get along just fine the way things are currently.



Change comes slowly in Alaska and I would guess that this issue will be talked about for a good many more years to come.



If we talk about it long enough, eventually it will become a mute issue. We won't need a road. Eventually we'll be able to teleport ourselves to the Capital if we wish.



Beam me up Governor.



*****************************

Garry Gamber is a public school teacher and entrepreneur. He writes articles about real estate, health and nutrition, and internet dating services. He is the owner of www.Anchorage-Homes.com and www.TheDatingAdvisor.com.

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Discover the Lighter Side of the Internet

We all know the Internet is a great tool for finding out information and sharing knowledge. But as a human sometimes sitting at a computer all day can get quite tedious, especially if it is your job 5 days a week. This feeling can be compounded by other problems in one's personal life, and the result can mean little productivity because of a sour mood. Well humanity does have a lighter side, and this too can be explored on the Internet. Sometimes a little humor or interesting trivia can really take the edge off a bad moment. You'd be surprised at how much comedy and insight is expressed on the Net. I've been exploring what's out there and I just can't stop laughing. Laughter of course is the ultimate medicine and some believe it to be the highest form of life. My only warning is don't get hooked on this stuff as your work ethic will probably become worse than ever! Now, there's a lot of stuff on the Net and not all of it is positive humor, but you can surf around the undesirable stuff with ease. To give you an idea of some funny sites I discovered, here is a short list but I'm sure there are thousands of others you can find by doing simple word searches: www.bored.com, www.linkydinky.com, www.chickenjoke.com, www.crazyfads.com, www.crazythoughts.com, www.dancingbush.com, and www.stupidvideos.com. I really advise checking out the last site and watching the video entitled 'Evil penguin2'. This nearly brought tears to my eyes as I already have a soft spot for penguins. So, you've got jokes, funny videos, kooky trivia, strange thoughts and perspectives on different aspects of life, and even the most 'powerful' man on Earth-George Bush doing an animated dance imitating John Travolta in 'Saturday Night Fever'. You've really got no reason anymore to sit in front of your computer worrying and wallowing in self-pity. I've always thought that humans have put too much emphasis on technological development as opposed to the spiritual side of things. This comedic aspect to the Internet has shown me that people can also be quite clever in more lighthearted endeavors. Some of the ideas on these sites really flip the world upside down and make you question why we do the things the way we do. This could be considered a step forward in our evolution as we see the underlying truths in our cultural systems. Laughter is the key to humanity reaching a higher level of consciousness. Imagine if everyone on our planet could all be happy enough in one moment to laugh at the same time. The Earth would shake, the seas would rise, and all the animals would stop what they're doing to join in. The vibration would probably cause a ripple to flow out into space affecting other planetary systems. Then, imagine all the beings of the Universe laughing at one time. We're talking serious celebrations! We're talking about black holes folding in on themselves in result of the positive energy wave forces demolishing all negative forces in their path! It's called the Laughter Revolution, and it might just be the next step for you to take to reach that long awaited goal of happiness. Come on, take a look around, there's a whole world of funniness just under the surface of our perceived 'normal' reality. We have to wake up and smell the cheese?Oh the sweet cheese.

Jesse S. Somer
M6.Net http://www.m6.net
Jesse S. Somer is a 'laughing boy' hoping to utilize the human-packed comedy hidden in the Internet to morph into a 'laughing man'. He also hopes to incite others to join in the Laughter Revolution that one day will spread across planet Earth.

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Marines Dont Take Crap

We live in a world of widgets. People manufacture, distribute, and sell them. You name it, they're doing it. I have a friend who is a toilet paper salesman. God bless him. It's an honorable job and my butt and I give him a two ply thumbs up thank you butt it's not something I, personally, could ever do-do.



I have a friend who told me once that the litmus test for taking a job is if you meet a girl and you're embarrassed to tell her what you do for a living then you probably shouldn't be doing it.



Let me tell you about a career choice I was never embarrassed to tell girls about, the Marines. Make no mistake. The Marines are a business. We manufacture the world's finest fighting force, and distribute them worldwide to sell Democracy. If we have to, we'll kick their you know what, provide toilet paper to wipe their butts, and not even take their names because we wouldn't even know how to pronounce them.



The enemy usually needs toilet paper when we get through with them because when they see the Marines land we usually scare the crap out of them. What can I say? War stinks!



There's a lot of things Marines do that stink. We don't like it and complain that it's not what we signed up to do.



We joined the military to see the world but all we end up seeing is bad weather and bad attitudes. So we say, "If I wanted to deal with this merde I'd have taken a summer vacation in hell or a winter vacation in France. The Germans spanked them, we had to save their butts, and now they're little ungrateful terds.



I'd love to see a recruiter now. "You'll get to travel the world." Let's see, where I could have gone in the last ten years, Somalia, Afghanistan, Bosnia, and Baghdad. Wow, can you throw in a free trip to Liberia?



It's hard to tell a service member that the grass is never greener on the other side because the places are young men and women go usually don't have grass but war has some positives. For instance, it educates the American people. If you asked most Americans what the capital of South Dakota was they'd say, "I don't know." If you asked them the capital of Afghanistan they'd say, "That's easy, Kabul."



They also learn geometry too, hello Sunni Triangle. The only problem is in a few years they might make the mistake of trying to book a vacation to the Sunny Triangle because they heard it was, to use the parlance of our times, "The bomb."



Marines actually have to go to these sewer holes. They have to live there and survive and it is no joke to them or their families but they love it. I used to get a kick out of Marines who said, "This is the hardest job in the world. You never sleep and when you do it's in the dirt; you get to go hiking, with a 100 pound rucksack on your back, and you get paid to visit areas of the world you'd never pay money to go on vacation to see, but it's the greatest job in the world. You'll love it."



Make no mistake, Marines love their jobs and as you probably know, are "The Few, The Proud." Marines are prouder then game roosters and meaner then cocks. If the Marines made toilet paper it would be two ply steal plates in order to cover their butts when they use the head.



Being is a Marine is a dirty job but the best part of it is that we don't take crap from anyone. Every young man and woman should do a stint. If you're interested, go down to your local recruiter and put your signature on a piece of paper, preferably one ply.



Michael P. Westhead is the founder of www.cutthroatcomedy.com which features original quotes, jokes, cartoons, products, and articles focusing on politics, current ev

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Wanted: Treadmill for an Elephant

Maggie, the 22 year-old African elephant, has been a resident of the Alaska Zoo since 1983. The Zoo recently decided that Maggie needs nicer quarters, more attention, and a treadmill. She weighs 9,100 pounds and does not get enough exercise, especially during the long Alaskan winter months.

Alaska Zoo officials debated this past year about whether to keep Maggie. She has been the only elephant in the zoo since 1997 when her companion of 14 years, Annabelle, died. Some experts believe that in order to be healthy and happy a zoo elephant should be part of a small herd of 3 or more.

The Zoo's elephant committee decided that the risks of moving Maggie out of state and of totally changing her life were too great. Besides, she seems happy here and she has a familiar "herd" in Alaska already. Numerous Zoo officials, animal handlers and exercisers, and familiar frequent visitors spend many hours a day with her.

In order to increase Maggie's comfort and health, zoo officials decided to give Maggie's living quarters softer flooring and better ventilation. Zoo staff will also increase the number of hours that they spend with Maggie from 8 hours daily to 12 to 16 hours daily.

Finally, the Zoo will help Maggie get more year-round exercise and lose weight. They will purchase an elephant-sized treadmill. However, nobody has ever designed or built an elephant treadmill. Designs are being developed now, but if you have any good ideas bring them forward.

Then stand in line behind me to watch Maggie work out on her new treadmill.

Can you imagine the elephant-sized headphones and iPod that she'll need?

*****************************

Garry Gamber is a public school teacher and entrepreneur. He writes articles about real estate, health and nutrition, and internet dating services. He is the owner of http://www.Anchorage-Homes.com and http://www.TheDatingAdvisor.com.

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Top 10 Ideas To Revive a Fizzling Relationship

by: Micheline Micheline


Top 10 Ideas To Revive a Fizzling Relationship
?Copyright 2005 Micheline

Love is exciting, and when a relationship is new, almost
everything you do together is fresh and alive, and keeps
you enthralled. Then time begins to pass, and while the
love is still there, the relationship may have lost some of
its sparkle, whether it's because you now have a family
or not. Here are some of the top 10 ideas to revive a
fizzling relationship that might just put some of the
bubble back into the champagne of your life.

1. Do something unexpected. Send your partner
flowers at work. That applies to men, too! Or take them
out for dinner on a weeknight.
2. What lit your fire to start with? Strike the match
again, by duplicating that initial moment you fell in love
with your partner, and be sure to tell them why you've
created this just for them.
3. Communicate. If you find it hard to say things, try
surprising your better half with notes in their lunch, on
their pillow, in the car, etc. Often the written word opens
other doors.
4. Make time just for you. And don't break the date!
Book babysitters ahead or clear your work calendar so
there is nobody on it but the other person.
5. Get out of the rut!-literally. Take your partner
somewhere new, and alone. Even if it's just a cabin on
the lake. Rediscover each other all over.
6. Find something you like about your partner, every
day. Then tell them what it is.
7. Find a shared interest. Explore new hobbies,
sports, or other interests that you both like, and can
participate in together.
8. Accept your partner's faults. Then admit your
own. Make an effort not to keep repeating them out of
laziness or habit.
9. Get physical. Touch your partner. In compassion,
sympathy, friendship, and sexual attraction. Let them
know that you are there.
10. Make promises, and keep them. Slip a note into
their wallet or purse that says what is being served for
dinner tonight, and promise that dessert will be worth
waiting for!

Micheline says, if you're still in love, there is always hope.
Visit http://www.MoreRomanceInYourLife.com for 37
more tips to revive your love life.

This article is free for republishing
Micheline says, if you're still in love, there is always hope.
Visit http://www.MoreRomanceInYourLife.com for 37
more tips to revive your love life.



Contact him at http://www.MoreRomanceInYourLife.com

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Feng Shui and Romance

by: Heidi Richards
Using the Ancient Art to Enhance Your Romantic Space

“If your love life needs a quick boost, you can use the art of placement to produce the romantic results you desire.” Heidi Richards

Feng Shui (pronounced fung shway) is the ancient Asian practice of object arrangement and space planning designed to bring balance, harmony and well-being to your environment. Its purpose is to enhance prosperity, creative, health and romance. Feng Shui fortifies a home with positive energy known as chi. The attainment of positive chi is both an art and a blessing to those who manifest that chi. The word “feng” means wind and “shui” means water, each one associated with a good harvest and ultimate good health or good fortune.

If your love life needs a quick boost, you can use the art of placement to produce the romantic results you desire. Relationships need the proper environment to grow. They need the balance of the five elements, too much or too little will find the romance wither. Here are some Feng Shui tips to enhance your romantic space:

The first thing you must do is remove clutter out of your romance area (generally this is the bedroom). That means you must remove trash, dirty ashtrays, dead plants and nothing should be stored under the bed. Dust and cobwebs on the fans, walls, light fixtures and ceilings should be cleaned away.
Enhance your space with romance colors, such as shades of pinks, reds and whites. Guys, this does not mean it has to be feminine. You can use maroon, grayish tones of pinks and whites to achieve the same results. The key is to not use any one color so much that it overpowers the others. Other good colors include browns, beiges, lavenders, yellows and deeper shades of those are appropriate.
If you keep flowers in the room (an excellent way to attract romance into your life), make sure they are always fresh. At the first sign of wilting, toss them out. Silk flowers are an okay alternative, provided they are free of dust. Absolutely no dried flowers as they signify death. Also, make sure the roses are de-thorned. Nothing prickly such as cactus, unless your goal is to break-up.
In Feng Shui a Relationship Alter positively stimulates a relationship. Designate a special place in your romance area in which to put items that will encourage a healthy, loving relationship. Things to include in your relationship altar can include a heart shaped pink crystal quartz, a pair of candles, mandarin ducks.
Use the Pairs Principle to encourage love. That means two candles, two nightstands, two lights on top, two potted plants, two pillows, two chairs, etc. The Chinese symbol for love is Mandarin ducks. They signify love, romance, fidelity, affection, and loyalty in love.
Your bed should be placed in the commanding position of the room. This is to permit the widest possible vision. The door or entry to the room should be easily seen from the bed. And the head of the bed should be against a wall or against a corner. If you have nightstands, make sure one is on either side (a pair) and that the bed is accessible on three sides to attract and keep a partner. The bed should not be placed under a window.
The bedroom is for sleep and intimacy. No one should come into your room without your invitation. There should be no distractions such as workout equipment, a television, things that would remind you of work.
It is good to hang pink (heart-shaped) crystals and wind chimes in a sunny window to attract good love energy (yang).
Pictures of you as a child, your children or other relatives should also be removed from the bedroom or romance area. This space should be reserved for couples and should only display pictures of the two of you.
Dim lights will give the room a warm, inviting feeling. No harsh fluorescents or high wattage lighting, here.
While this is by no means the ultimate guide to Feng Shui for Romance, it is a good start. These ten tips will give your relationship area the boost it deserves and your romance the fulfillment it requires. Altar your space and you will altar your love life. If you want to know more about the ancient art of Feng Shui, there are many excellent resources listed below.

Recommended reading:

Feng Shui for Love & Romance by Richard Webster

Feng Shui DOS & Taboos for Love by Ana Ma Wong

The Complete Illustrated Guide to Feng Shui: How to Apply the Secrets of Chinese Wisdom for Health, Wealth and Happiness by Lillian Too

Build a Better Life Using Feng Shui: A Workbook and Guide for Applying Feng Shui in Your Environment by Debra Michie

About the author: © 2004 - Heidi Richards is the author of The PMS Principles, Powerful Marketing Strategies to Grow Your Business and 7 other books. She is also the Founder & CEO of the Women’s ECommerce Association, International www.WECAI.org (pronounced wee-kī) – an Internet organization that “Helps Women Do Business on the WEB.” She can be reached at www.HeidiRichards.com.

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Decorate your bedroom for romance!

by: Pat bowlin
Want to spice up your bedroom to let some romance in?

Decorating your bedroom for romance doesn't even have to be difficult or expensive. You can really let your creativity run wild here.

The most important thing to keep in mind is that you want to soothe all of the senses to both take away other distractions and relax completely. This should be your oasis, your refuge to reconnect and enjoy your partner's company.

A great place to start is lighting. Get rid of the glare, and you're well on the way to more romance!

Candles, candles and more candles can bring a lot of romance into the bedroom for a pretty small investment. Candles, both large and small, tapered, pillar or votives all generate a warm, inviting, flickering light to the room. Group them together in several areas of the room for the best effect.

Adding a dimmer switch to lighting can also be quite effective in designing bedrooms for romance- and cost very little as long as you can install it yourself. It isn't as difficult as you might think!

Placing mirrors to reflect your softened light will add more depth to your bedroom.


Window dressings that are plush and appealing should darken the room and prevent lights from traffic or other external noise from interrupting the romantic mood you are creating. The window treatment can match or contrast the bedding and often can be found as an accessory to the bedding set you select. Draperies that billow and flow can add a touch of romance to the bedroom as well.

The bed, of course, is the focal point of the bedroom in most cases, and the bedding you select for romance can set just the perfect mood.

Many people think of silk and satin when thinking of romantic bedding. Both silk and satin can be costly and a bit slippery on the bed. The good news is that the same luxurious effect and feel can be created with 100% cotton sateen sheets if you don't want the added expense of genuine satin or silk linens.

Choose bedding for your romantic bedroom that centers on relaxing, romantic colors. Avoid using too much grey, yellow or pink. Red, black, white, blue and green is very popular. Newer colors like pearl, bronze and even gold can really create the feeling of luxury and are quite romantic.

Remember that all of your senses should be involved for the perfect touch of romance- so adding interesting texture for bedding can be another opportunity to bring out romance. Velvet, faux fur and velour are rich, soft to the touch fabrics that can be used for comforters, blankets and throw pillows.

Peacock Alley is one of the most well-known luxury bedding maker.

They offer an especially warm, romantic bed linen set called the Marrakech Ebony. It features shades of green, gold and ebony in prints reminiscent of the African plains and looks especially romantic when highlighted by candlelight. 55% linen and 45% rayon create luxurious sheets which are easy to care for.

The Vienna Ensemble from Peacock Alley is 100% Egyptian cotton in white on white featuring eyelet lace. Euro sham, coverlet, boudoir pillows add wonderful interesting detail to the bedding which brings back the romantic 1800s.

And if you'd prefer to keep your expenses down abit, then you could go for the shabby chic approach, which means focusing on your own sense of style, mixing just about any romantic touches into the bedroom- as long as the overall result is soothing and relaxing. You don't have to follow anyone else's idea of romance. Just be creative!


If you really want to go all out, you could add a canopy to your bed. You can easily create the same effect of a canopy bed with about 10 yards of material like linen, silk or satin and four hooks placed in the ceiling. Simply drape the cloth so that it billows and flows to just above the bed linens. This touch will enhance any spacious bedroom and can provide a bedroom with low ceilings a more spacious feel.

Finish your new romantic bedroom with abit of soft music, maybe some potpourri and some fine chocolates and champagne, and there you have it!


You can live in a bedroom that surrounds you with romance every night if you wish. Simply bring together your own creation of romantic touches and enjoy.




About The Author

Patricia Bowlin informs and entertains you as you shop for your home bedding! Find out everything you need to know about chosing the perfect blankets, pillows, bed linens, comforters, and other bedding here now.

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Recovering from Romantic Fantasy

by: James Sniechowski
Chances are you never thought you needed to be rescued from romance. In fact, you probably feel you need more romance in your life, not less. The truth is that most hearts are broken in the painful difference between the possibility of real romance and the insistence on the fantasy of romance -- with the real thing taking the loss.

Recovering from romantic fantasy is based on your willingness to accept who you and your partner are -- without deceit, without drama, without all of the false puffery so many of us put around our images of love, relationship and intimacy. Recovering from romantic fantasy does not mean living without it. It means you will have, perhaps for the first time in your life, the chance to experience reality-based romance that is meaningful, fulfilling, passionate and can actually help create a relationship you can trust and delight in. This kind of romance -- real romance -- can fill your soul with the feeling and knowledge that you are loved for who you are, just as you are, and it can inspire you to love deeply and fully in return.

What can you expect should you decide to recover from swept-away romantic fantasy? Here's an example.

Judith: One evening, we bought a special pie for a friend, to thank him for a favor he'd done for us. It was a strawberry-banana cream pie with a collar of sculpted whip cream around
the top. Careful not to tip it, Jim set it on the floor of the car behind the driver's seat and we made our way home.

The day had been particularly difficult for Jim, and he was feeling raw and vulnerable. When we got home, he picked up the pie and the box caught on the edge of the seat, tumbled over and landed top down. It was that kind of day. He looked to me and timidly said, "Maybe it'll
be okay." He opened the box and the pie, of course, was demolished, more like strawberry-banana-cream porridge. Jim slumped.

I was angry that the pie had fallen and shocked when Jim announced it might have survived intact. I knew better. How could he not have? But, more importantly, I knew Jim was
suffering. I understood what he was going through. So, I put my arm around him and told him, "It's a mess, isn't it? I'm so sorry..... Let's get another one later."

It was a moment of real romance that left both of us feeling whole and human, compassionate and connected, loved and loving. In contrast to the grandiosity of romantic fantasy, we were just in our garage with a fallen pie, and yet we both experienced a sense of grace and beauty and a special bond of intimacy.

Can you picture yourself sitting around dreaming up a romantic fantasy where a dropped pie leads to heartfelt love? Most people, being honest, would have to say, "No." That's just not how romance is thought of in our culture. Besides, romantic fantasy always ends up being punitive. It is contemptuous of "fallen pies." It's dismissive of human imperfection, derisive of anything that doesn't reach the lofty heights of romantic bliss.

Real romance comes from beyond what you already know. It's spontaneous, unrehearsed and open-hearted. It's about what's happening in the moment, about the attention and affection between two people.

When you're open to the heightened awareness of real romance, a vivid, even ecstatic experience can spring from any unexpected moment. If you try to hold onto it, you cancel your invitation for life to catch you off guard and take you into the deepest places of your heart and soul.

(Excerpted from The New Intimacy, Health Communications Inc.)

About The Author:

Judith Sherven and James Sniechowski share the secret of life-long romance. Be sure to get your copy of their Free 1 hour teleseminar "Keeping Romance Alive," and find out how. Just go to: http://www.judithandjim.com

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Romance On A Budget – Cheap Thrills Can Lead To A Lifetime Of Love

by: Heidi Richards
Romance isn’t about spending money, it’s about spending time together, spending energy and creativity to attract and keep the relationship exciting and the love alive. - Heidi Richards

Romance isn’t about how much money you lavish on another. It’s about attracting the object of your affection. Romance is about making dreams and fantasies come true. Romance is defined as “an exciting and mysterious quality; a relationship between two lovers.” It is the “act of making your partner feel loved.” Romance is more than an act, it’s a state of being. It’s the heart, the soul and the mind working together to create an adventure, and increase enthusiasm for one another.

“Romance means intimacy and connection, which means paying attention to detail. It’s making her lunch or giving him a massage. It’s making the bed together and cuddling. It’s holding hands and leaving little “love notes” around the house. It’s touching and feeling and listening and sharing. It’s excitement and serenity, spontaneity and planning. It’s telling the other person what you want, and doing the things the other person likes. It’s connecting deeply.

Romance is about timing, imagination, exploration and creativity. Being Romantic is about…. being creative, being willing to take a risk. Sometimes it’s being sweet. Sometimes it’s being silly. Romance is about … the right attitude. And attitude can cost you a little or a lot. True romantics have the right attitude; and use imagination to cultivate loving, sensual relationships.

So just how do you develop the right attitude? Start out with little acts of affection, little things to show you care and can be romantic. Here are a few suggestions (excerpted from the book, Romance on a Budget) to help you spark your imagination.

- This Kiss (#10) – You must remember this; a kiss is still a kiss… kiss often. Repeat several times.

- Look into My Eyes (#11) – When you gaze into each others eyes, everyone else seems to disappear. And looking intensely at one another can send a message to your lover that can lead to other things.

- You Light up my Life (#15) - Spray the perfume or cologne you wear on a light bulb. When the light is turned on the scent of you will fill the room.

- What a Feeling (#19) – Tell your love how much you appreciate him/her. Write your message on a post-it-note and stick it where it is sure to be found.

- Get out of your Comfort Zone (Intro) – Do something impulsive, even a little risky that will excite your lover and ignite the romance.

Like the song says “Love Don’t come easy.” I believe that “Romance Don’t Come Easy. “ But with a little practice and planning, the results can be thrillllllllling….

About the author: © 2004 - Heidi Richards is the author of The PMS Principles, Powerful Marketing Strategies to Grow Your Business and 7 other books. She is also the Founder & CEO of the Women’s ECommerce Association, International www.WECAI.org (pronounced wee-kī) – an Internet organization that “Helps Women Do Business on the WEB.” She can be reached at www.HeidiRichards.com.

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Relationship Advice: Follow Your Gut!

When people seek relationship advice from a trusted friend
or family member, it is most likely a waste of time, says
relationship author Justin Luyt.

"We ask for relationship advice often when we feel we do not have
the answers to our relationship challenges," Luyt says. "We grasp
for external wisdom, with the false belief that we do not know
the answers, but if we are being authentic to ourselves, we have
those answers."

Luyt recently published The Spirit of Romance, a book that offers
readers practical relationship advice and uses interactive
planning tools to not just change thoughts, but feelings and
behavior, too. Using the term "Spirit", Luyt defines the inner
source people must acknowledge before looking honestly inside
themselves instead of seeking relationship advice from others.

"We know why we are where we are in the relationship," Luyt
says, "but often avoid our own internal introspection. Spirit
challenges us to grow and learn."

He insists that by strengthening relationship with Spirit,
people can truly grow and move past the challenges at hand.

"When we ask for help from a friend, it is for an ear... not
guidance," he summarizes.

Throughout his book, Luyt offers a look at self-reflective
relationship advice, all based on Spirit, which allows people to
see others in their true light, as people filled with desires,
dreams and vulnerabilities.

Luyt writes people seek mutual personal and spiritual growth as
the basis for any relationship. His ideas of Spirit inspire
people too look within their core being to experience something
they can understand and feel completely. This acceptance of
Spirit negates the need for outside relationship advice when
people can answer the crucial questions with knowledge from
within.

When a relationship changes form or course, people have it within
their Spirit to redirect their energies from sensitivity and
vulnerability to spiritual strength. This strength gives people
the ability to become their own relationship advisors because
they have gained the insight necessary to overcome false doubts.

Luyt writes, "People are here to grow; and spiritual growth
occurs in a space of love, not fear."

Through his public speaking and counseling work, the South
African native has developed the Accelerated Romance Coaching
Program, a one-of-a-kind mentoring and coaching system for
singles and couples. Various Fortune 500 companies have used his
trans-continental engagingly fresh, out-of-the-box and into- reality approach for group seminars, training and coaching.
His book, The Spirit of Romance, is available at:
http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com



---------------------------------------------------------------------
Justin Luyt has been doing Coaching and Consulting for over 12
years. He is the published author of "The Spirit of Romance" and
facilitates numerous seminars. To contact him call 1-877-7ROMANCE
and his book is available at: http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com

Justin Luyt has been doing Coaching and Consulting for over 12
years. He is the published author of "The Spirit of Romance" and
facilitates numerous seminars. To contact him call 1-877-7ROMANCE
and his book is available at: http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com


Contact him at http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com

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Got A Closet Full of Trendy Clothes? Watch Out!

by: Donna Monday

You just bought a pair of Ugg boots to go with your hip hugger jeans and trucker cap. And that’s not all. You scour the fashion magazines for the latest trends, then go running out to fill your closet. Trendy is good, right?

Uh, not so fast. Keeping abreast of the trends in fashion is essential to not looking outdated, but having a closet full of trendy clothes can quickly turn into a big waste of time and money, unless you’re Paris Hilton. Maybe Paris can afford to buy and discard clothes like candy, but the average woman needs a wardrobe with some staying power.

All the fashion experts agree that you should build your wardrobe around classic pieces like: blazers, tailored suits, neutral bottoms and tops. Classic clothing lasts for years and is very versatile.

On the other hand, trends come and go. Those Ugg boots you just bought along with the trucker caps are already passé (according to fashionistas in the know). You can either give them away to Good Will or keep wearing them because you really like them.

Trends in fashion are very fickle: some last a long time, while others fizzle in a single season. Because of this, it’s almost impossible to keep up with every single trend. For practical reasons, you should pick a few trendy pieces – that look flattering on you – and add them to your wardrobe.

When the trend is over, discard them or defiantly wear those trendy clothes whenever you like. As long as people aren’t laughing at you in the streets, who cares?

Just remember not to overdo it. You don’t want to have to replace your entire wardrobe every time a new trend comes out – unless you’re an heiress with money to burn.



About the author:
Copyright 2005
Donna Monday
Find the hottest looks in plus size fashion – discounts, bargains and more!
http://www.plus-size-appeal.com



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Guide To Choosing A Fashion Design School

by: Linda Emerson

A successful future in the fashion design industry depends on the right choice of school to attend. Although fashion design is not one of the more popular careers to pursue, if your talents lie in this field, there is ample opportunity awaiting you. However, the first thing to hurdle is your choice of school.

When choosing a fashion design school, consider the following factors.

Area of Focus

Look into the nature of the school. Is it solely a fashion design school or does it offer other courses. Is this school well-known for its emphasis on fashion design?

Fashion design schools are few and far between. This makes it harder to choose one that fits your bill. Your first task will be to find a reputable school that will aid you in your training.

Also, look into whether the school participates in any fashion design competitions or has accomplished anything of reknown in the industry. This is a sure sign of their commitment to the fashion arts and its education among students.

Different schools have different strengths, find a school that plays to your strengths and has specializations in the field of your choice.

For example, you might choose a very well-known fashion design school only to find out that they specialize in childrens’ clothing, while the field of your choice is adult formal wear. This could diffuse your interests, and dull your specialization.

Make sure you know what field the school you are scouting focuses on. This will help you specialize in that area too.

Alumni and Job Placements

Does the college offer job placement assistance? And has the alumni from this school gone on to be successful professionals? Always learn from other’s previous experience. If you see that those that had gone through this school before you received proper training and are successful in their field, that is an indication of a good school.

Most of these reputable schools have numerous connections in the graphic arts industry. They usually offer job placement services. You may want to consider this when choosing a school.

It would do no harm to start looking at the educational background of your admired fashion designer. Checking out the schools they came from will give an idea of the sort of training these artists went through. From here, you may make decisions as to whether you would like to choose the same school as they did.

Curriculum

You must assess whether the curriculum is relevant to you field of study. You may want to compare the curricula of different schools to see which offers the best form of education.

It would also be wise to check the quality of the teaching staff at that school. Having established artists who teach at a fashion design school is also an indication of a good training program.

Student to Teacher Ratio

Ask yourself: how big are the classes and how many teachers and classes are available at this school before you choose it. The more the students, the lesser the efficacy of the teacher. However, if there are too few students per teacher, that could tell of a different problem – that of quality. If this is the case, it may be that the school is not popular or is suffering from anemic academic performance.

Accreditation

Accreditation means the school has passed certain standards of educational quality. Accreditation is performed by the U.S. Department of Education. Fashion design schools must be accredited to prove their level of competence.

Check with the State Postsecondary School Licensing Bureau to see if the college you are investigating is accredited. Also, check the National Approval and Accreditation for this concern.

Cost

Some people may proclaim that to obtain their education, they would spare no coin. Unfortunately, it also pays to be practical in your choice of fashion design school. If the school you choose has a tuition rate that is beyond your financial capability, you might find yourself working and unable to pursue your studies consistently due to the financial stress which may lead you to look for part-time work.

Scholarships

You might want to consider whether the design school you are looking at offers any scholarships. You also might want to know the terms to them too. Some schools offer scholarships based on academic performance. Some offer them based on fashion design competitions they hold regularly.

Your choice of school is an investment that will last you a lifetime. Proper care and investigation in choosing such is truly important. When you are comfortable with your choice of fashion design schools, you can now chart your path towards a successful career.

About the author:
For more great fashion design school info and advice check out: http://www.topdesignschools.com


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Do you need a Coach Purse?

by: Mike Yeager

Women worldwide pride themselves with their coach purse. These designer, top quality purses are a must for the fashion savvy individual. The Coach Brand is well known for its quality and fashion. Although they carry many fashionable items, such as wallets and even PDA holders, they are known for their handbags.

The Coach purse is part of the American culture. For years, and generations, they have been produced and loved by Americans and other countries. The company prides themselves with designing the perfect bag, one that provides functionality with American fashion. Known also for their top quality leather, Coach purses are not only durable, but make a statement about the individual whose arm they rest on.

The Coach purse can also be found in local department stores of higher quality. There are many styles and colors available to the consumer these days. With each purse, the consumer receives a unique, one of a kind, work of art. While purses may seem similar, the method from which they are created produces this uniqueness.

The Coach purse is not for the faint of heart. While they, and their accessories, are fashion statements, they are pricey. The price reflects their quality, uniqueness, and style. While this price may be too high for the ordinary, the high class, fashionable individual will not be without this fashionable accessory.


About the author:
Mike Yeager
Publisher
http://www.my-purse-4me.com/


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5 Great New Fashion Trends for Women

by: Donna Monday

Here’s a quick look at some of the new trends in women’s fashion. The overall trend is chick and ladylike. Liven up your wardrobe by adding a few of these pieces.

Brooches

Your great grandmother probably wore these in her day. Now brooches have made a stunning come back. The most popular brooches you’ll see are large and flowery, with that vintage look. They look great with any kind of jacket.

Camisoles

Wearing a pretty camisole under a suit jacket is very chic and adds the perfect touch of feminine glamour to your work wardrobe. You can also pair a camisole with a pair of jeans with heels for a sexy casual look.

Cropped and Fitted Jackets

Jackets and blazers are more popular than ever and go with a variety of outfits. The new fitted style shows off your curves. Fringe is also another accent popping up on boucle blazers. Lots of new color options will give you more ways to mix and match.

Faux Fur

Enjoy the luxurious look and feel of fur without harming any of our furry friends. Not only are the new faux fur coats magnificent, but you’ll find faux fur used as accents on sweaters, hats, and gloves.

Prints

Polka dots, stripes, flowers, and paisley prints are popping up on all kinds of clothing items. Prints are a great way to compliment a neutral colored top or bottom, plus they’re fun!



About the author:
Copyright 2005
Donna Monday
Find the hottest looks in plus size fashion – discounts, bargains and more!
http://www.plus-size-appeal.com



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